I met him 12 years ago…
I met him 12 years ago. One of my best friends, Lauren Ritchie, and I started a summer dance intensive called RISE. We brought in the top dance faculty you’d normally only get at a massive convention, hosted a small group of 100 dancers, and included personal development/mental skills classes into each day. In our second year, tWitch ‘Stephen’ Boss came to our intensive and gifted us all with his talent, and even more so with this contagious energy and love. From the moment we picked him up at the airport it was clear he was “one of us”. He cared and paid as much, or more, attention to the care and growth of his inner world love and wholeness as he did his outer world of performance and success. We loved him, everyone did.
When I learned he died by suicide, I was in shock. Everyone I knew that I heard from was as well. Never did I think this would be his reality. And, I also know from my personal experience, what we see on the outside is not always a representation of what is going on inside. When I was at my lowest, I did not look “low” on the outside. I effectively kept 8 years of suffering with bulimia and the severity of it a secret from everyone in my life. After I recovered from the addiction/illness, it took me 7 more years before I told anyone about it (I share more of this story here).
At the start of this new year, I continue to be moved by and reflect on tWitch’s death. In my reflection, the word that continues to present itself to me is Peace. In my coaching practice, the 4 most common desires people share with me are the desire for Peace, Love, Freedom and Connection. But of these, Peace is at the forefront for me at this moment. And Peace has invited itself to be my guiding word and teacher for the year.
I have been going inward and asking these questions:
How is my state of inner peace right now?
What needs to change or shift to care for my inner peace and the peace of the people around me?
What am I holding onto that I need to let go off to protect or create peace in my life?
What would it be like for me if my only focus was to be a presence of peace in all the place I am today?
What is peace asking me to be or do in this moment?
This past year for so many of us brought many experiences that disrupted or tried to disturb the peace within and all around us. As we move into a new year, I invite you to come into your power and choose what you are taking with you into this new year and what you are leaving behind.
None of us will know tWitch's real experience of life, but here is what I know of mine so far and what I wish to share.
In my darkest of moments, it didn’t matter how much someone told me I was loved, or I mattered, or I was valued… I couldn’t hear them, and it never brought real peace. For me, it was the experience of being in the presence of peace, that supported me to know it myself. As much as words of affirmation are my love language, peace for me is found in the silence and stillness. Sometimes with others, sometimes alone. I think this is because in this stillness we are so much more open to receive the presence of Pure Love. Each one of us will have a different experience of what peace is in this moment or in this season, which brings me to today’s invitation.
Today’s Invitation is to pause, take a moment to let your being come into stillness, and connect to your own essence, experience, and expression of Peace. And then lean in a little further to that essence, that experience and move forward as that essence, BE PEACE. It is not found outside of you. You are the Peace on Earth you seek. Right here. Right now. It is in you, and radiates from you.
tWitch's presence in my heart always be one of peace, joy and love. His spirit lives on.
photos: From Rise 2010.
Journal Prompts
How is my state of inner peace right now?
What needs to change or shift to care for my inner peace and the peace of the people around me?
What am I holding on to that I need to let go off to protect or create peace in my life?
What would it be like for me if my only focus was to be a presence of peace in all the place I am today?
What is peace asking me to be or do in this moment?
Today's Invitation marks 1 year that I have been offering The Invitation. I thank you for the trust you place in me by sharing your email with me. It is a privilege to share this space with you, and my intention will always be to bring the deepest value and a presence of peace and pure love one Invitation at a time.
Big love and blessings as we walk together into 2023.
Grace, peace, and love,
Julianna
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